Apparently I am part Beaver and part Lion. At our Mom's Night out last night I learned (or it was confirmed for me) that I am a leader, am organized, a task master, and am introverted. This part doesn't make sense to me. I want to be around people, am dying to make friends but have difficulty making friends because I am introverted. For a few years now, I have been working on being more extroverted, but it is so hard. I can organize and run a homeschool support group complete with a small co-op,but when I am invited to someone's house for dinner, I have a tendency to freeze up.
The visual that came to mind last night is that I am sitting on a park bench alone and am waiting to meet that friend who can sit with me and just observe the world with me while we talk about deep things that make us think. Someone who will talk with me and is interested in giving her point of view but is open to hearing others. Someone who would enjoy going to a bookstore with me or for lunch in a park. Oh yeah, if this someone has kids, she likes my kids and I like hers and they aren't interrupting us a million times as we try to talk.
The other part of the personality assessment is that I am a perfectionist. Could be why I'm so lonely all the time.